< ramble >

So, what is it about this blog and two year intervals between posts? As I've opined previously, it would be easy to make excuses. My mother used to tell me “either you've got results or a good story. The story may be true, but it’s still just a story.” The goal is to write so a good story might be fitting – but it’s still not results.

So, why am I writing now, you may ask? Ah, the impetus. It’s a wonderful thing. As is often the case in my life, the impetus this time is a book: Quitter by Jon Acuff. Those of you who know me, know I love reading books designed to motivate and drive one to change their life. Like many of the books I've read over the years, Quitter talks about following a dream. Unlike most of those books, it gives a decent roadmap for following a dream – most importantly, to keep the day job until it’s time to move on.

That advice is golden. I don’t know how many jobs I've left, chasing a dream – or just because I couldn't stand working somewhere soul crushing when I didn't have a dream towards which I was working.  In fact, I’m back working at a place I left chasing “something better” that wasn't my dream – it was just supposed to pay better.

I suppose my frustration is I know I’m supposed to be doing something; I just don’t know what that something is. I've had glimpses. To me, those glimpses are more maddening than anything.

So what now? I have skills. I’m even proficient at many of them.

I can work with my hands and my brain is wired so that figuring out solutions to complex building problems is fun for me.

I can sell.  I don’t love selling, but I’m good at it – as long as I believe in the product. I've even conquered the phone monster – that demon that shares all the things that will go wrong on the next call. I’m even proficient at getting past the gatekeeper to speak with C-Level executives. But I don’t love it. It’s definitely not my passion.

I love learning. If anything is my passion, it’s learning. I love the process of “I have to know about X” then finding the resources to learn everything I can about the topic. And, for me, part of learning is doing. I am definitely a kinesthetic learner.

I can code. I’m definitely not a coder, but I can write code. It’s part of the learning process I mentioned. I worked for a company that needed a website. I taught myself HTML, SQL, and classic ASP (he said, dating himself) and built a database driven eCommerce website. Quite an accomplishment at the time.

I enjoy public speaking. I've heard that most people would rather die than speak in public. Not me. As long as I have something to say, I have no problem sharing it.

And I can write. I enjoy writing. I can’t say I have the same passion for writing that I have for learning, but I enjoy the process of figuring out what I want to say then putting it down (even if metaphorically) on paper. I even write well at times.

So, now I write. I write to get what’s in my mind out so I can consider what’s going on in that three pound chunk of mush.

And you get to read it.

Lucky you.

Lucky me.

Lucky us.